Lost another friend to Facebook: this time, a pretty simple and standard mistrust--I was supposedly hitting on a married woman. She found my language to be insinuating, more than just friendly overtones; I think having a woman friend 20 years younger than oneself might be a technical impossibility, at least for somebody who has no money, and is now trained by long hours of loneliness and boredom, to be way too loose with their words and way too desperate for human companionship.

I am one who goes to places in the human fabric I am simply not ultimately welcome, whether I cross political barriers (frequently), or age barriers (not quite as much); you find out not in uncertain terms, just why people stay so tribal and dont mix, either socioeconomically or politically or fill-in-the-blanks. Nobody is really prepared or has the reserve of self-esteem to take all the rejection. 

If you are only going to love those who you know will return the affection, you haven't really risked much, and that's why the tribalism of the nuclear family unit is so primitive--if the love you give your kids is the best and the love they give you is the best, there isn't really going to be a hell of a lot of room for the big chances you must take to build bridges, bridges not based on common courtesy or money and business. Most kids love their parents and vice versa; it may get trying but generally family members have some kind of love for other family members, however buried by distance or time or early trauma.

So putting the family first, putting first the first tribe, might mean bridge-building to the political or social other, might not be too swift or furious--and often, probably really isn't happening at all.

In other words, we may all be in this together, but when the smoke clears, we will be back in our neighborhoods of ourselves and our little tribes, the golden moment of catyclysm gone, and the painful outlines of a money worshipping culture back in all their stark relief. I for now, just wish to be at peace for awhile by myself...